The art of forgiveness
寬恕的藝術(shù)
To forgive may be divine, but no one ever said it was easy. When someone has deeply hurt you, it can be extremely difficult to let go of your grudge. But forgiveness is possible -- and it can be surprisingly beneficial to your physical and mental health.
寬恕是神圣的，但是沒(méi)有人說(shuō)很容易做到寬恕別人。當(dāng)你被深深傷害的時(shí)候，想要不懷恨在心是很難做到的。但是寬恕是可能的——而且這會(huì)給你的身心健康帶來(lái)出乎意料的益處。
"People who forgive show less depression, anger and stress and more hopefulness," says Frederic, Ph.D., author of Forgive for Good. "So it can help save on the wear and tear on our organs, reduce the wearing out of the immune system and allow people to feel more vital."
《寬恕的好處》一書(shū)的作者弗雷德里克博士說(shuō)。 “懂得寬恕的人不會(huì)感到那么沮喪、憤怒和緊張，他們總是充滿希望。所以寬恕有助于減少人體各種器官的損耗，降低免疫系統(tǒng)的疲勞程度并使人精力更加充沛?！?div style="height:15px;">
So how do you start the healing? Try following these steps:
那么，如何恢復(fù)自己的情緒呢？試試下面的一些步驟吧：
Calm yourself. To defuse your anger, try a simple stress-management technique. "Take a couple of breaths and think of something that gives you pleasure: a beautiful scene in nature, someone you love," Frederic says.
讓自己冷靜下來(lái)。嘗試一種簡(jiǎn)單的減壓技巧來(lái)緩解你憤怒的情緒。弗雷德里克建議：“做幾次深呼吸，然后想想那些令你快樂(lè)的事情，比如自然界的美麗景色，或者你愛(ài)的人?！?div style="height:15px;">
Don't wait for an apology. "Many times the person who hurt you has no intention of apologizing," Frederic says. "They may have wanted to hurt you or they just don't see things the same way. So if you wait for people to apologize, you could be waiting an awfully long time." Keep in mind that forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciliation with the person who upset you or condoning of his or her action.
不要等別人來(lái)道歉。弗雷德里克說(shuō)：“許多時(shí)候，傷害你的人沒(méi)有想過(guò)要道歉。他們可能是故意的，也可能只是和你看待事物的方式不一樣。所以如果你等著別人來(lái)道歉，你可能會(huì)等相當(dāng)長(zhǎng)的時(shí)間?！蹦阋斡?，寬恕并不一定意味著順從那些讓你心煩意亂的人，也不意味著饒恕他或她的行為。
Take the control away from your offender. Mentally replaying your hurt gives power to the person who caused you pain. "Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you," Frederic says.
不要讓冒犯你的人控制你的情緒。內(nèi)心里總是想著自己的傷痛，只會(huì)給傷害你的人打氣。弗雷德里克說(shuō)：“與其老是關(guān)注自己受到的傷害，還不如學(xué)著去尋找你身邊的真善美?！?div style="height:15px;">
